Ishalla Sharu, 26, of Vancouver, BC,  has been hounding her mother for a copy of her birth certificate for weeks. Her driver’s licence indicates her year of birth to have been 1990, but she remains unconvinced. “I’m positive death lurks around the corner. The notion that I’m twenty-six is insanity, flat out insanity. If I’m twenty-six, and this is how I feel now, by thirty I won’t be able to leave my bed.”
Sharu complains of constant back pain, poor vision, reduced hearing, arthritis, and general fatigue. “I feel awful. And I feel like I get my period every week. I guess right before menopause it gets super frequent and you get it out of your system. Either way, I’m relieved this will all end soon.”
Ishalla’s mother Madia has tried to assure her time and again that there’s nothing wrong with her. “Not in the sense of a real disorder; she’s just a piece of shit. I’ve told her to come see her birth certificate if she needs to but she only leaves the house to go out drinking or to pick up take-out. She doesn’t exercise ever and she cooks for herself once a month. And she came out of my vagina when I was twenty-two and now I’m forty-eight and she thinks she’s older than me and certainly acts like it. I hate my daughter.”
Presented with the above statement, Sharu appeared by and large indifferent. “My mother is young and temperamental. She’ll understand one day when she feels this way.”
It’s been reported that Sharu has since reached out to her mother, extending an olive branch, and asking for two thousand dollars to purchase a motorized wheelchair.

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