We talked to a resident of a local senior’s centre in Etobicoke and he told us the centre’s residents unanimously were done hearing about Canada’s birthday. Ed MacNeil explained, “It’s not even that old! This generation thinks it needs to celebrate everything. Truth is, we just didn’t get invaded.” Certainly an interesting comment considering Canada’s controversial history and its own origins.
Many activities had been planned for Canada’s sesquicentennial. Nation-wide television campaigns had begun as of midnight on January first and have been harassing Canadians daily. MacNeil also added that he was mostly just sick of seeing the same old commercial during his nightly Jeopardy, “I just didn’t think I could take 355 more nights of this nonsense.”
Thankfully, the cancellation of this birthday celebration has put to rest some heated debate out on the East Coast that was caused by New Brunswick’s tourism slogan for 2017 being a passive aggressive, “Celebrate Where It All Began.” Charlottetown, the birthplace of Confederation, was quick to dismiss this imposter as simply, “very on-brand for New Brunswick.”